Economy, My Bad

I need to confess that the terrible time the economy is going through is my fault. I have tossed and turned for weeks and can no longer live with what I have wrought. For years I asked the Lord for help with America's consumption problem. I asked him why people need televisions in every room, their bathroom, and even in their cars. I asked him if those collector plates or anything made by the Franklin Mint were actually worth anything. I asked him to let the American people see the error of their ways and stop buying so much crap.

I knew the consequences of such a change in consumerism would strongly affect the economy, but I had no idea banks would fail or that Starbucks would close stores. I assumed the Lord would just make people less interested in material goods. Maybe make them get into yoga, fly fishing, or something. They say the Lord works in mysterious ways but letting the air out of the housing balloon seems to me akin to severity as one of the plagues. Sure, people are consuming far less, but, really, fly fishing isn't so bad.

Whew, I'm glad I was able to gather the courage to write this confession. Hopefully everyone can forgive me and move on. From now on, I will be much more careful about what I pray for and consider possible negative implementations. I no longer pray for Peace on Earth because I fear that achieving it might involve the eradication of the human race. I certainly wouldn't want that on me. I've done enough already.